The anxiety of waiting

I’m sure we’ve all been here at some time in our life: You await some event– Christmas, a grade in a class, a call from that someone special — and get anxious and feel as though you’re in knots. The mention of the event can send you into an emotional storm. The worst part is that you can do nothing to make it happen more quickly because the event’s fruition is not within your control. Every time I feel this way, the logical side of me knows that fretting won’t make anything better; in fact, it just makes me feel worse. Notice that I said the logical side. The emotional side, like a stubborn child, generally refuses to listen.

An anxious person
Anxiety-- yuck!

Today, I remembered that there’s a third side to all of this drama: the spiritual side. This is the soul connection that transcends emotion and logic and instead seeks a connection with a higher power. Call this higher power what you want, ok? The point is the belief in something all-powerful and universal, not the name.

So I reached down to the bottom of my soul for the answer, and this is what I found:

God, you who are closer to me than my heartbeat and my breath,
Who knows the deepest desires of my heart before I do,
And considers the needs of my soul:
I trust in your judgment in this matter
And know that you will guide the you that is in other people
To arrive at the best, most life-giving decision.

Once I recognized that truth, the tension and anxiety flowed out of me, replaced by peace. What was once muddying my soul and literally clogging my thoughts with worries has become peace, anticipation, and joy. Whatever comes of my current situation will be the best for all concerned. If I get the answer I want, I know that it will bring growth, peace, and fulfillment. And if I don’t get my choice of answer, I will remain peaceful and continue along my path.


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