My Insights Are Melting…

The Old World Swallowtail (Papilio machaon), i...

Freezing cold last Saturday and 90 degrees today. Who knew? Glad I had my shorts ready!

I’m preparing for two separate interviews right now and I had a massive insight about my interview journey, long and arduous as it’s been. I remember the first hiring package I sent over two years ago, and how my hands shook as I sent it. I wasn’t sure then what kind of job I wanted, only that I wanted to be in a collegial environment. From those inauspicious beginnings, I have probably applied for well over 500 positions all over the world. Literally.  I’ve interviewed with schools in Europe and Asia, in addition to a whole bunch here in the States. I’ve come in second place 10 times. I could allow that to frighten me, or I could reflect on the journey. I choose to reflect on what I’ve learned.

In the beginning:

1. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be in administration or on the faculty.

2. I wasn’t sure where I wanted to live, but I knew it had to be “somewhere else”

3.There’s a lot of “somewhere elses” out there

4. I operated under the old paradigm in which I could work tirelessly 12 hours a day

5. Anywhere was good enough, but I had to make the transition work around my job


1. I am a business and accounting instructor, and a darned good one at that!

2. The search isn’t about living and working “anywhere”; it’s got to be what’s best for all parties, including me

3. “All parties” includes my family, situated as they are on opposite coasts

4. I need to work for a place where students are valued as much as the faculty

5. I need to be in a place where I’m not just making a living, struggling paycheck to paycheck

6. I need trees, hills, greenery, water, and LIFE all around me

7. By “all around me,” I don’t mean that my bedroom window looks into my neighbor’s bathroom or living room (which has been the case for the last 9 years). Space is good.

8. I need to be where I can follow my passion for teaching the people who need it most: in the classroom, in an area where people tend to be underserved

Sounds like a lot, but that’s a two-plus year set of revelations distilled into a series of insights. The cool part is that I now really know who I am, what I’m meant to be, and how much everyone else I love factors into this choice. It’s also about spiritual alignment with the creator-spirit that reaches out to other people through me, and my yoga practice has certainly facilitated that.

I’m a preparing for these interviews, completing the work that has been given to me, and leaving the “how will this come to pass?” in God’s hands.

One thought on “My Insights Are Melting…

  1. These are all such lovely reflections. I love how you have used this time for clarity. It’s so easy to become frustrated when we find ourselves in “second place.” What a lesson to us all to take those in between times as a pathway to being certain of what we really want. I am certain that your perfect job match is right around the corner. 🙂

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