There’s unconditional love, and then there’s…

Tough love.  Not this type:


I mean the love that cares enough to be compassionate and honest simultaneously.

I used to think that unconditional love was the most challenging type of love possible, but I have recently decided that my assessment was incorrect. Unconditional love involves total acceptance of a person, no matter what. It means taking the good, the bad, and the tremendously ugly, but loving the person anyway.  We have probably all heard the term at some point in time, right? If you’re like me, you aspire to display unconditional love in most, if not all, of your relationships because we have been taught that it is the most true love possible.

I think that tough love is one of the truest types and far transcends unconditional love.

Tough love is accepting a person unconditionally. It is transcendent because it requires a level of courage and honesty to deliver difficult messages. It requires self-belief in your ability to deliver lessons that will be accepted by the recipient.  Furthermore, it requires you to care enough about another person to tell them what they most need to hear, and to say it in a loving and compassionate way.

I think it is the most important type of love. Why?

  • It promotes growth in yourself and the other person.
  • It relies on honesty and strength as the basis of messages.
  • It seeks to help another person without the promise of personal benefit.

I am just discovering the strength to deliver tough love, which is both frightening and liberating. I am fortunate to have an excellent mentor who is teaching me by example.

It will be interesting to see how this new growth will integrate with my journey.



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