We all have a facade of some sort. You know the one– the face we show to the world. It goes deeper than that. Out actions and demeanor varies, depending on the situation. In fact, I’ve recently heard somewhere that we actually have three faces: The one we show to the world, one to family, and the one that no one else ever sees. I know I certainly have those three faces.
What is unnerving is when you are accustomed to a certain person’s face and then, perhaps unexpectedly, see one of the others.
I inadvertently eavesdropped on a conversation between two people yesterday. I know that eavesdropping can lead to hearing things not meant for me. What I heard was the “family only” voice of someone who I considered family, and the tone and content was unexpected. It was cold, calculating, and manipulative, dismissive of anyone else’s problems except for her own. In that moment, I realized that I may have only seen this “face” of this person a few times. Each time I have seen it, I have the same reactions: surprise, anger, and fierce protectiveness of those about whom I care the most.
What’s the lesson here? Don’t eavesdrop. Know that we all likely have that less-favorable side that might distress others if they truly witnessed it. Remember that who I am is diminished in no way whatsoever by this other person.